With arms wide open, under the sunlight.

It’s been a little while since I’ve felt good enough to write here…or at least since I actually had something to say.

 

Well, for one thing I love my babies:

Tabifu

Mr.DV

My Jimmy

My daddy <3

Laura

Pretzel

Halfstack

Bailey

Johnny

and most of all, My beautiful baby Christopher…who truly, truly loves me.

<333333333

 

I am filled with Love right now.

 

 

 

 

Artlantica

I think the thing I am most happy about, is the fact that I have given you a reason to live again.  Amazing.  I love you so much.

I am in love with you so much. haha.  and the best thing about that is that you are in love with me too.

 

Oh man this is goooood.

GAH

Iloveyouiloveyouiloveyouiloveyou

 

 

woo!

<3

5-27

 

i can not, and will not, let you down this time =]  Baby, we belong together. <3

 

Let Yourself Fall

I hope I still love you

by the time you want me back.

Day 3

Dear Christopher,

You’d think you’d at least try to leave a spot open this weekend to see me.  God.

I really really really feel like you just don’t care anymore.

I hate not talking to you.  I feel like it’s making things much much worse.

Fuck.

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGuh

Day 2

Dear Christopher,

Fuck you.  I don’t make any damn difference to you.  You don’t miss me.  You don’t need me.  And it’s a damn fucking shame because I certainly need you.

Day 1

Thus begins a segment I’d like to call ‘dear Christopher’.  I’m writing you a letter at the end of every day that I don’t talk to you.  Just to get out everything I want to say to you, as a way to cope with not talking.

 

It has only been a day so far, and it’s already hard not to seek comfort in your cute little mannerisms.  What the hell have you done to me, for real?  I’m so damn dependant on you.  It’s just sad.  Which is why I’m doing this.  I can’t wait around for you expectantly, when in the end, I’m always disappointed.  I love you very much, but I have to break away from you if we’re ever going to work again.  Which you know, of course.  It’s just about time I actually forced myself to do it.  For the benefit of us both.  Maybe now you know how I felt when you tried to do this to me?  I doubt it.

 

Anyway,

Good night my baby.  I wish I could hear your voice.

zxddexhj

i fucked up my hair.

 

fuckshit.

 

There’s no god damn point in getting back together, if you’re just going to fucking break my heart again by going to Boston.  There’s no fucking way I’d be able to stand a long distance relationship with you.  No fucking way.

Fuck this, fuck everything.  I lose everything that’s important to me one way or another so why the fuck do i god damn bother?

Life is just going to keep piling up its bullshit until i’m fucking old and can’t take it anymore so I die.

 

I

hate

everything

forever.

I don’t know why i always trust you with my tears

Maybe because, somehow, in the end I’m never disappointed.

 

 

I love him more than anything in the whole world

 

 

WIth all my heart

 

Even if he is just a boy.

Soy Un Perdedor

Your maggots eat away at me

Lying in the dust

Your deceit is more than pain to me

This intense betrayal of trust

You expect more than limits

But give not a dime

This coffin continuously pivots

Decaying over time

Your breath teems with fire

Though you have no malicious intent

My logic has taken you for a liar

Though my love is yet cement